Existing Belief

As I start one of my final weeks as a freshmen here at Oklahoma State University, I have also just finished my final paper for my philosophy of life class. I am so thankful that the great professors here offer extra credit. My professor who I feel should not be named has brought up some major subjects throughout this semester, it is his job as a philosopher to bring up a controversy and then argue why he feels he is right. We have talked about knowledge, the mind, and now God. I wrote my final paper on the existence of God.

Many philosophers, scientists, and other people have tried to disclaim the existence of an all power being, who is in every way perfect, in this part of the class that has shown to be just as significant. Our professor wasn’t trying to have us deny God but more or less develop our own opinion on why he exists. The first week was rough, being within the bible belt most responses came as I grew up with this belief and I show no reason to see why it’s wrong. I of course like my opinion and think it was a great response to the question that most christians forget to ask themselves. “Why do you believe in God?” Although saying I was raised this way or that is just what I believe could be a valid opinion, it was not taken as a valid response.

It was brought up to me that day the many things we hear most often about Christians, it isn’t that they sin just as much as I do but they cannot explain why their belief is all powerful or how their God is perfect.

I didn’t write my paper trying to encourage my professor to believe in God or his perfectness but explained the ways of the bible and the people by Jesus’s side as he went through things we can only fear. I wanted him to grasps the realness of the prophets and the things becoming true. I wanted my teacher who does believe in the perfectness of God, to also believe in the existence of him in our life too.

Most people revert the bible “to back in the old days”, when the things happening to the people then happen now, no we don’t exactly get rocks thrown at us for believing in God but we do get the lash of hurtful degrading words that in our era we take as getting rocks thrown.

God is a perfect being because in our good and bad times he shows the compassionate, loving, and comforting being he is. Those words can’t even describe the feelings God actually gives.

My response to my teacher might be something he does not expect but it is the only way I can personally describe how God is a perfect being for me. “I was a victim of sexual assault my 8th grade year and as I coped with this existence while others looked down on me, the only person I could confide in was God. He kept me going each morning to get up and smile. Although my time with that burn mark was not one I like to reflect on it truly shows the compassion God has for his children. I have no other reason to not believe in God or his perfectionism, he is the sole reason I am here today, and gives me the purpose to keep going. Today I will fight the good fight to keep sharing my story to those in need of love and compassion, because I know the man upstairs is the only one capable of giving as much as we need. Although at times I do not think I deserve his love he gives it anyway. At life church this past sunday the preacher said something people around the world heard but it couldn’t of spoken more clearly to me. ‘Never put a period where God has put a comma.’ My story does not deserve a period because it was not the end. I was a victim of sexual assault, but my God has not forgotten nor forsaken me but instead showered me with love and compassion because he is the all powerful and perfect God.”

I think its time we start sharing our stories, because our difficult times show how similar our era is with the men and women of the bible. It’s our time to be the disciples of God, so start sharing.

 

xoxo taylor

Life Thoughts

I realized last night how long it has been since I took the time to sit down and write. With all the writing and homework of the college life sometimes you forget to sit down for yourself.

As my roommate and I decided we would go to bed earlier than usual tonight and wake up early tomorrow to start again on homework, I started to reflect on my conversations throughout the day. Almost 65% of them were about boys/relationships/jokes of being single/everyone wants to date. This honestly freaked me out. A small back story a friend of mine got engaged over spring break so of course thats a huge deal and we celebrated her with a candlelight ceremony which was so pretty. That is why most conversations going on yesterday were about the dating life, as some would call it.

I sat here thinking about how so many major things are happening in the world and were more worried about who we want to spend our lives with rather speaking up for what we believe in. If that doesn’t scare people about the future of this world then I don’t know what will. I honestly started to freak out, mostly because over my spring break I had a wonderful time and part of that was because I was single. I can barley get up in the morning and get to class with make-up on, much less worry about a boy.

Now, I make jokes all the time about being single and oh I can see my self always being single, well I am okay with that. I think it takes someone driven to go after life alone, and I personally think I am way too independent to need anyone anyways. Aside from this small rant, I think as a college student we hear more about “taking life as it is today because you’re not promised tomorrow” and that freaks girls our to run into the first guys arms she sees. To some this makes sense, to me, I’m trying to run to an airport to go explore and see what I haven’t yet.

I think God made man and woman to come together and grow. I also believe that God has a perfect time, and his time is always better than our time. So i’ve made a pact for myself and I hope if you’re single, dating, married, someone who can read, take the pact with me. I believe in God’s perfect timing, so I will praise, worship, and explore his beautiful earth he created without searching for anything or anyone more than him. This is very broad and vague so take it as you will, but it gives me peace to know God’s plan is bigger and for somethings it may not be the right time.

 

P.S. to anyone who was curious, the probability of Facebook finding you a boyfriend is less likely than me being any taller than 5″1. Yes, this is sad, more for me than you. But I promise it will happen when it is supposed to.

 

Taylor

Don’t use your nose

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This is my 10 year old sister, yesterday she learned the one thing that I think most of us have forgotten. She learned the element of judging others and how harsh our thoughts and snide comments truly are. It is quite amazing isn’t it? We see something wrong and don’t want to take the time to help but first judge the situation. My sister goes to a small school, some children don’t get the things she does, like a shower for example. My 10year old sister, among all of the times she can be mean, has a heart of gold. She gets asked why she’s friends with the kids that don’t always smell as nice as her, he response alway being I don’t smell anything wrong with them. Now, you might think I’m being rude or way too far out of the box. Have you ever considered maybe it’s time to get out of your box and quit judging the appearance. We put on too many masks anymore, it’s time to be open and ourselves. No one can be more you than yourself. I might be bragging a little too but if you knew my sister you would know this small comment needed some recognition. I’m proud to say my sister saw something that some people seem to over look, we are all unique and special, it only takes a friend to help us figure it out sometimes.
Wherever you’re reading this from, take a second to look around, find someone you’ve been too afraid to approach because you might get bad looks or people might question you, go to that person and dig a little deeper then the appearance. Love this person with your heart and soul. Good things come from love, so go, love someone different today.

The Ugly Truth

One year ago on this day at 9:45 I would look at the clock in my history class counting down the seconds until the bell rang so I could mark yet another day off until the days I graduated. Today on this very day at 9:45 I am sitting in yet another history class staring at awe of how much I actually enjoyed this class a year ago. It amazes me how different yet the same I am in one year. As a senior of high school I counted down the days until I walked on Oklahoma State University as an official college student. I’m here to tell all the high school seniors right now the ugly truth about college. You cry more than you have the past 18 years of your life. I promise. Everyday you get up more tired than the last. Oh, and never count on a full night of sleep. It does not exist. Class? yeah you cannot miss it. You miss one class, you lose four points or more. You either eat all day or not at all, no in between. It’s sad to look back to a year ago wishing my life away, telling myself that I am completely ready for college was a major joke on my part. Get ready to study weeks before a test and still fail because thats just what happens. People tell you as a high school kid that college is easy, you will find what you want to be the rest of your life. It takes a long time to know this. You will change your major. And it will be okay.
Don’t let my words discourage you because I have met my lifelong friends, I wake up happy where I am, and I get up feeling motivated to make my life a success. High school seniors live it up, watch movies with your parents, hang out with your friends the right way, you don’t need alcohol to have fun. Oh, and when it come to the end of your graduation look at your family and smile because number one you made it this far, you have such a bright future ahead of you, but hug everyone as much as you can because you don’t know when you will get to hug them again. Remember they aren’t just down the road from you, they are hours away. Love everyday and live it to the fullest.

xoxoTaylor

Finding Lifetime Friends

This blog is going to be a little different than my other ones. It could be very sappy in some ways, but nonetheless I’m so excited to write about this. As a freshmen who is wanting to RUSH (sorority) most people who don’t laugh at you and tell you that you’re paying for your friends. Rush for me was quite different than for others. I loved it! Everyday I got to meet someone new and have a meaningful conversation with them. I don’t think people understand how meaningless most of our conversations are nowadays but they truly are. Anyways, back on subject, rushing was amazing because I love talking and meeting new people. So yay I found my home and I’m not paying for my friends!!
I have met so many incredible girls in my house, some that are funny, loud, quiet, smart, and of course we’re all beautiful in our different ways but that’s what makes my house so special to me. In four weeks I met my best friend. Let me tell you again…FOUR weeks. Most people graduate high school still wondering who their friend even was and I met my best friend in four weeks, that is amazing. In sororities we have big/little, now some people find their best friend(I did), their wanna be mom, and their friend that doesn’t really hang out. My Big and I realistically don’t see each other for one hour a day and when we sleep. If two people could be attached to the hip and be excited about it, that would be us. Now, you might be laughing at me or you could just not understand. My big shows me who I want to be, who I could be, and how to strive to be the best I can be. My big an I are those annoying girls that have inside jokes, code words, and can look at each other and know exactly what each other are thinking. It’s crazy that I’ve known someone for such little time but yet I already trust her so much. I think God puts certain people in your life for different causes. He gives you people who make you mad, happy, sad, and eventually fall in love. God has put my big in my life for many reasons I think. She’s there when i’m sad, stressed, happy, crazy, and many more things that probably shouldn’t be in a blog. When you find your best-friend it makes things so much easier because someone is there to go through it all with you.
I never said being in a sorority is for everyone, but I have put countless hours in with my sisters and they get me through the hard times of college; like bio lab. I know theres many journeys ahead with many uncertainties but I also know that no matter what the future holds I know my big will still be there to pick me up when I fall and cheer me on, even when I fail. I wish I could put into words how thankful and blessed I am to get to call so many wonderful girls my sisters but that would make this a long blog. Know God has a plan, a reason, and a better way for you. I know my big was a part of his plan and I’m truly thankful for her.
Love you forever, Big.

xoxoTaylor

Exciting Dreams

The countdown is on, currently three weeks away from move in day. Summer has literally flown by, got on a plane and waved at every student as it left. It is absolutely crazy to me that I’m going to college at my dream university. As I am going for one of my dreams, remember the dreams you have for yourself. Have you given up on them? If you have, this is your start to remind you that you have time to get back on the roller coaster and try again. Dreams are a big thing to me, no matter the size. I think the best part about dreaming is it comes from your own mind, no one gives you the idea and tells you to make it your dream. You get to decide how big or small you want it to be and decide that you can do it. Reach for your dreams and when your arm gets tired remember thats when your so close to getting it.

Keep dreaming

xoxoTaylor

Speak Positive

Today on twitter I said something along the lines of “I wish social media would fill up with positive words instead of all the negative.” Not to my amazement I only got about one retweet and one favorite (If you have a twitter you understand this lingo). If you don’t have a twitter a retweet is where someone liked/agreed with what you said so they decided to share with their followers too and a favorite is kind of like the “Like” button on Facebook. Later I wanted to test my theory on who saw my tweet so I tweeted again, something more modern like “Fathers Day is the best” who would of thought 50 retweets and even more favorites. Why does this amuse me? In social media you see more people getting trashed than you see uplifted. Our media that we “thrive” on is trashy. People think it is funny or entertaining to watch the ones around them being laughed at. I got to thinking if we all wrote one positive message on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, what ever you use how many people would see that and feel more positive rather than negative. If humans cut out the negativity they would feel more stress free and even more they would fell happier inside. God calls us to proclaim the truth, the gospel is a positive truth. Go proclaim truth!

xoxoTaylor